I’ve been uncovering a massive shadow side along the journey of “accessing my highest potential.”
With this almost obsessive orientation towards “expansion,” I’ve been subtly telling myself..
...I am never enough exactly as I am...
I want you to explore yourself, inside and out.
I want you to get intimate with your own shadow, just as much as your own light.
I want you to know yourself so wholly that no aspect of you is unseen.
Underneath my exuberant belief that we are spiritual beings having a human experience, I doubted whether what I sought was attainable at all. I had moments where I wondered if I was doing something wrong.. I felt like perhaps I had not been deemed worthy of the eternal embrace.
I felt I had to do more to prove myself.
If you listen closely enough, I'm betting you'll find that what you thought was you falling off your path is actually life redirecting you, providing you valuable lessons you wouldn't have had otherwise.
I'm guessing that when you keep going, you'll look back and realize that the Universe was quietly preparing you to find your purpose & fulfill your mission
What living with Lyme has taught me more than anything else is how to have deep gratitude for this human experience. It has taught me to enjoy the little moments, both the ones filled with light and the ones filled with pain, because no matter how shitty the moment may feel, it's just an experience and at some point, eventually, there will be something else to experience. It has taught me that the only constant in life is change, and that instead of pushing against what is happening, I can surrender and choose to learn from it instead.
When I first started feeling the funkiness waking up inside of me, I got scared. My fear voice said, “Don’t let it come out. Keep it in. They’ll judge you. They won’t like you anymore and you’ll loose your friends.” I expressed this fear to each of them separately and they both assured me that they would love me no matter what I said or did.
It was as though their reassurance that they wouldn’t disown me if I expressed the darker parts of my being opened the flood gates which allowed the full expression of myself to be seen.
